Relax

Don't you just love when babies do this? Sleep with their arms or hands sticking out. It makes me want to tell them to relax.
This something I have had to tell myself a lot. For some reason (maybe it is because I never went to the hospital) i keep feeling like I should be recovered and back to my good old self. But I am not. i still have some recovering and sleeping to do. I have to force myself to lay down and take a nap sometimes because there is so much around me that needs to be done. I try to tell myself to relax, cause it will get done...someday.

I have also had to make myself chill out over nursing. Nursing was something I was determined to do but because extremely painful because he was not latching right and frustrating because no matter how many times I tried I could not get him to latch right. I found myself getting very emotional over the whole thing (like crying for days at a time). I was also getting to be very snappy with my other children and just felt awful about myself. I decided in the long run, nursing just wasn't going to work for me and this baby. And while it is a decision that still makes me sad, it has given me peace. So for now I am pumping and he gets formula every once in awhile. It is very hard for me to buy something that my body can make for free, but I just try not to think about that.